


some things you just can't speak about

by black_sun



Series: scribbles [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Heartbreak, M/M, Marriage Proposal, One-Sided Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:55:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25628581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_sun/pseuds/black_sun
Summary: Bokuto beams and reaches across the table to hug Akaashi. The edge digs into his legs but he barely registers the actual physical pain.day 1 of bokuaka week: confessions
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Series: scribbles [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757059
Kudos: 11





	some things you just can't speak about

It’s so hot today, my face might melt off, Akaashi thinks, walking to their meeting point. He tries to get in the shadows cast by trees, but the air is still too warm and feels disgusting as he breathes in. 

He thinks about what Bokuto could possibly want to see him for. He hopes it’s something important. Bokuto’s voice on the phone was trembling as he called. 

It was a couple years ago when he called sounding almost like that. 

Back then, he said “I confessed to him, Akaashi. I said that I like him, and he turned white and bolted out. It’s so fucking over.” 

Back then, Akaashi tried to be as supportive and consoling as he could manage without showing how happy he was. Now he had a chance again. Now Bokuto could forget about that jerk and there was a chance that after a while he would return Akaashi’s feelings… 

A week passed, and that guy came back. He brought some flowers and so many tears and apologies along. I’m so sorry, he said as Akaashi peeked from the doorframe of Bokuto’s bedroom. I’m so sorry, I panicked. I love you, can we just try? And Bokuto’s resolve to push him away that Akaashi’d helped him build other that week fell apart, crumbled, and Akaashi felt his heart break more and more with each touch and kiss that he unwillingly witnessed. He wanted to turn away, but just couldn’t.

So he sounded like that time, but there was also something Akaashi was unable to put his finger on over the static and outside noise. Bokuto said “I have to tell you something”. Akaashi felt hope bubble up inside at these words, but knew better than let it grow. Still, now he feels anticipation and really wants to know why Bokuto decided to drag him out in such weather.

As he comes to the corner they agreed to meet on, he sees Bokuto already waiting.

“Sorry if I kept you waiting,” Akaashi says and watches a nervous smile spread on Bokuto’s face. These tiny bubbles of hope come up to his throat and make it hard to speak. 

“What… What did you want to talk about?”

“Let’s go inside,” Bokuto answers and holds open the door of a coffeshop they’re standing in front of. “It’s better if we sit down.”

They sit near a window, and Akaashi half-watches people passing by to distract himself from the intrusive thoughts. 

“So,” Bokuto starts. Akaashi swears his heart would jump out if he opened his own mouth in that moment. “He proposed to me.”

The lights go out and everything crashes down.

“What did you…” Akaashi can’t really speak but he still tries. “What did you say?”

“Of course I said yes!” Now Bokuto’s fully smiling, though his voice still trembles slightly, and Akaashi can finally understand what that emotion was, the one he couldn’t decipher on the phone. It was happiness and excitement and disbelief all mixed together. He probably should react in some way that’s fit for the best friend, because Bokuto’s smile falters and he asks, “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m, I’m fine, it’s just,” the only truth in these words, “so sudden.” He takes a deep breath. “I’m so happy for you.”

“What I wanted to ask in person is actually,” Bokuto decides to go on, “would you be my best man?”

Akaashi feels like his insides are torn into the tiniest pieces, he feels like he’s going to bleed out dry right here, right now. It hurts so bad just hearing all that, he can’t imagine what it’ll feel like seeing them happy and getting married.

“Yeah,” he says instead. “Of course!”

Bokuto beams and reaches across the table to hug Akaashi. The edge digs into his legs but he barely registers the actual physical pain. 

He knows he shouldn’t be so bitter. It’s his own fault for not saying anything sooner, before Bokuto’s future husband even appeared in their lives. So he hugs Bokuto back and whispers “Congrats”. 

Now there’s nothing more for him to say.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry! i cried while writing it. i promise there'll be something happier ahead


End file.
